School Is Back In Session

And just like that summer is over and school is back in session for children and for parents too. I was led to write and share this because I had the back to school blues…. Not sure if parents are supposed to experience them but this mama did!

It could be that all of my little guys who aren’t so little anymore will be making big transitions. If you’ve been journeying with me then you know that I am a mama of four amazing children Tre - 14, Marcus - 10, Jeremiah - 5, and Zoe - 10 months. A wife to one cool husband Josh, and we co-parent. My two oldest boys are from 2 previous relationships and lived with their fathers full time and mama + stepdad on the weekends and holidays.

Up until my oldest came to live with me 2 years ago after being in Las Vegas with dad. So my back to school hustle and bustle had always been a bit different, we do the first day as a whole tribe but I wasn’t the one dropping and picking up littles from school on a day to day basis. I was coordinating my calendar so I didn’t miss events and constantly communicating with their dads to make sure the school knew mama don’t play and that we operate as a village.

But this school year started off all kinds of different Tre wanted to go back to Vegas for high-school I’d miss his first day. Marcus was going to middle school but would remain at the same school since they’re a k-8 campus. Then the youngest boy of mine started KINDERGARTEN! I don’t know if it’s the fact that they all are transitioning or the fact that the reality of it had hit me after all the preparation. But I lost my shit man! Like after driving Tre back to Vegas, Marcus acting like 6th grade was literally “whatever” and Jeremiah completely freaking out. I was like what the heck it going on the first week of school. Not with them but with ME!

While they weren't freaking out about the transitions (all except Jeremiah) I was. I am sure I’m not the only mom, parent, or woman going through a season of TRANSITION. I don’t know why it hit me so hard with all the boys starting school. I had to keep telling myself things are changing and it’s ok. The kids are growing and so was I… But still the lingering question of why was this hitting me so hard. It was because no matter how prepared we think we are TRANSITIONS are hard and we as parents and people, in general, don’t give ourselves enough grace to feel what we need to feel.

As a parent, you don’t have to get over it as fast as social media and society would tell you too. No matter how long you’ve been a parent or done something like back to school it’s ok to freak out if you need too. Feel what you need to feel mamas just don’t let those feelings stop you from learning what needs to be learned. I do believe that every emotion we feel good or bad is a signal of something we need to pay attention to in order to better understand or learn from.

Below are some lessons I’ve been sitting with about transition and change this back to school season.

  1. Meet anxieties about transitioning with gratitude (makes it a bit easier).

  2. Transitions mean there is growth happening or not happening.

  3. Not all transitions are bad.

  4. Not all are good but are necessary.

  5. Transitions show us things about ourselves and others.

  6. Transitions allow for a different perspective.

If you’ve found yourself in a transitional period in your life there may be lessons to be learned. Be open to being taught something new about yourself and your situation. Just as all my little ones are learning what these new grade levels bring. I too am learning what this new season requires of me. I am learning to be more aware of what my emotions are trying to tell me. If you’re transitioning you’re not alone. We are growing!

Let’s talk about transitions and change below or shoot me an email: hey@coffeewithashlib.com